Guy Smarts: How your texts are making you sound like a dick

If you’re really unsure about how your written word is coming off, don’t be afraid to soften it with an emoji or two.

A woman you met on Bumble messages if you want to get a drink. You respond with a "sure." Then...nothing. What gives?

Turns out, the reason might be in your response. The way you frame your answer might actually be pretty off-putting to the person reading it, new research published in the journal Computers in Human Behavior suggests.

In a series of experiments, researchers tested how people perceived a common text exchange—an invitation to meet up—when they used varying, one-word responses. The answers were positive (“yeah”), negative (“no” or “nah”), or neutral (“maybe” or “alright”). Some were given periods afterwards, while others received no punctuation.

When the affirmative answer had no punctuation following it, the participants rated the answer as slightly positive. No surprise there. But when the same “yeah” was followed by a period? The people actually rated the answer as slightly negative.

For context, on a scale of 1 to 7 (7 being the person really wants to meet up), the average rating for the no-period message was 4.26, compared to 3.79 for the one with a period.

They took the response with the period as less sincere—they believed the responder was actually less enthusiastic about meeting up (Here are the 27 worst kinds of texters we've ever messaged with).

The same results held true, but to a greater extent when the answer was negative to begin with, like a “no,” “nope,” or “nah.” In the cases where they were followed by a period, the participants perceived the responses as more negative than when there was no punctuation following it.

As for the more ambiguous words ("maybe" or "all right")? The responses that were followed by a period were still rated more negatively, but not to the same extent that the positive or negative responses were.

Including a period in that kind of text is grammatically unnecessary, since we're not talking about a full sentence with these kinds of responses. This subconsciously drives the recipient to believe it was added for a reason, the researchers write. The perception? It adds finality to the message, and actually ends up making it seem more abrupt, they say.

In fact, as Mark Liberman, a linguistics professor at the University of Pennsylvania told New Republic previously, this can end up coming off as harsh. "What they infer, plausibly enough, is something like ‘This is final, this is the end of the discussion or at least the end of what I have to contribute to it.’”

And when we’re talking about a positive response, adding a period to a “yep” or “yeah” can actually change the meaning, “perhaps leading to a sarcastic or ironic understanding,” the researchers write.

“All the elements of our texts—the punctuation we choose, the way that words are spelled, a smiley face—can change the meaning,” study author Celia Klin, Ph.D., said in a statement. “The hope, of course, is that the meaning that is understood is the one we intended.”

Bottom line: Your texts might be perceived more differently than you intend—and just one period can make a difference. So if you want to seem enthusiastic about setting up a date with her, leave the period out.

And if you’re really unsure about how your written word is coming off, don’t be afraid to soften it with an emoji or two, Klin said in the statement

SOURCE - PULSE.NG posted by Campus94